Why Dentists Need to Talk About Mental Health – Episode #689

On this episode of The Dentist Money Show, Ryan speaks with Melissa-Sue Methven, RDH, author, and advocate for mental health awareness in dentistry. Melissa shares her personal journey through grief, financial stress, and the pressures of running a practice after the loss of her husband to mental health. She offers insights on recognizing signs of distress, the importance of organization, and how self-care tools like breathwork can help dentists manage stress. Tune in to hear why open conversations, support systems, and finding your purpose are essential to overcoming the hidden struggles in dentistry.

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Podcast Transcript

Ryan Isaac: Welcome to the Dentist Money Show, where we help dentist make smart financial decisions. I’m your host, Ryan Isaac, and, uh, here with a, uh, new friend, guest of the show. Melissa Methven or Melissa Sue. What, what, what’s the best way to say it? I go by

Melissa Methven: Melissa. It’s fine. Okay. Yes,

Ryan Isaac: It’s in the corner of your video. Melissa Sue, but we’ll go Melissa. Yeah, I

Melissa Methven: Know on my book, you know, author and all that stuff. It has, that’s my legal name, so I go by that.

Ryan Isaac: Okay. Okay. Well, thanks for joining us. You’re joining from Gilbert, Arizona, right?

Melissa Methven: That’s right.

Ryan Isaac: Okay, awesome. Well, thank, thanks for doing this. We. Probably have a lot of shared connections in the industry.

We’re gonna get into this. You can introduce yourself, um, tell your story, but I’ve seen you do some like coaching and breath work, uh, classes recently at some dental offices. Uh, people we know and I, I’m, I’m sure we’re like, have a lot of mutual friends in the industry. So how about, let’s start here. You are in the dental industry, you’ve been family friends in the dental industry. How did you get started? What’s your story? Where does this begin for you? Yeah.

Melissa Methven: I, I, well, first of all, thank you so much. I’ve been really, really excited to be Same on your podcast especially, you have a big platform for the dental community, which is dear to my heart. Yeah. It’s National Suicide Awareness Day today, September eight 10th. Uh, well, I’ve been a dental hygienist for 16 years. Okay. And my husband, my late husband was a dentist. We actually owned a dental practice in Wasilla, Alaska. It was an 11 operatory office. Uh, we had oral surgery, pediatric, whoa. I mean, it was a large office, everything. So I’ve definitely, you know, been chairside along with my husband as an owner, as a husband, you know?

And so I’ve seen the highs and lows of owning, and he was quite young too. And so I have many dentists as friends. And now, like you said, I do provide breath work for the dental community. I’ve done actually a, uh, retreat in Sedona. Oh, there were seven dentists. And it was so profound to be able to give back to the dental community because as they give so much to themselves, to each patient, I mean, most dentists see about 30 to 50 patients a day.

Have 5,000 patients in their dental office. Yeah. So to be able to give back to them and have. A three day retreat for them. That was huge. That was pivotal. We’re still chatting on WhatsApp right now, really? So that’s Yes. Yeah. Congrats. That’s so great. I provided, uh, I think you probably know Dr. Nichols here in Queen Creek he’s fantastic. I had done a breath work session for his whole staff. I saw that. And, uh, you know, so cool. We’re patients as well.

Ryan Isaac: Yeah. Oh yeah. Okay. Okay. Yes. Well, let’s, so I’m glad you said that. Um, your story is going to go into the story relate husband. We’re gonna talk about mental health specifically in the dental industry, which I don’t know if you know how it’s ranked or there’s a lot of research that the dental industry is one of the, I don’t know how to say it. The highest rank for mental health issues or concerns? Suicide. For suicide. Suicide. Specifically. Suicide.

Melissa Methven: I am, you know, I have big dental community and I probably get, unfortunately, texts once a month. That we’ve lost a dentist to suicide. And I’m kind of that bridge right now. Wow. Because, uh, uh, like I mentioned in my book, the Truth Behind the Smiles, my husband, who was a dentist, died by suicide in March, 2022.

So it’s been three years now. Soon after, probably within a year of him passing, I felt called to write a book about our story because I knew that I needed to use my voice to share our story, all of it, because we were so good. We lived in a of hiding behind our smiles. My husband also had a great big smile and was used humor, you know, with his patients to calm their nerves. And we hid so much behind our smiles. Being in a small community, having a dental practice, we just kind of hid behind that. So I knew that was a disservice. Uh, and there’s too many dentists that are. Dealing with opiates, addiction, numbing agents, and suicide. So yes, it is a top profession.

Ryan Isaac: Okay. Thank you for we’re, we’re definitely gonna get, um, to that part of the story. Um, if you, if we could go back, I’m, I’m curious, how did you start yourself in the dental industry? Was that like a, a family thing, a something you saw, like what made you get into it in, in the first place and, you know, led up to the, where you’re at right now?

Melissa Methven: That’s a really good question. Actually. I was not, I, um, I was actually a flight attendant in my early twenties and I worked on a private jet and flew around the world with, uh, thought leaders ex US presidents. And when I met my husband who’s a dentist, I was always in college. I was in school, and I always said I wanted to be a physical therapist. Okay. I love learning about the body, mind, and. So that was kind of where my direction for my studies were. But when I met my husband who was a dentist and I was living in Canada, I finally moved up to Alaska and he says, well, what about dental hygiene? And so I started shadowing and, and I was like, oh yeah, this seems to be pretty flexible. I knew along the road I wanted to have a family. So that’s actually how I got into it. And, uh, studied dental hygiene.

Ryan Isaac: Do you still, um, do hygiene? Do you still practice? Yes, I do. Temping.

Melissa Methven: Yes, I do. Temping. I do temping. Okay. I, I love it.

I wanna keep my license and I really enjoy it. Right. But it’s definitely pivoted. Yeah. I’m really picky. ’cause my husband was also an. Excellent dentist, A perfectionist. Okay. And so now that I moved to Arizona, I’m in a temping agency and a gosh woo. It’s just not the same, you know? And yeah, I do prefer to work for a biological dentist that aligns more with my philosophy and what I’ve learned about mental health. In the dental industry. Yeah. And treating in the root cause.

Ryan Isaac: Yeah. I’ll bet it’s not the same. Um, yeah. From a relationship standpoint or just being with a team and cohesive in the same spot all the time. Yeah.

Melissa Methven: Yes. But in the same way I Huge s though, right? Yes. There’s a huge shortage. There’s definitely a huge shortage and, and for me right now, it gives me more flexibility with my children. Totally. And my schedule, my podcasts, you know? Yeah. My books and things like that. And be able to do breath work as well.

Ryan Isaac: Yeah. Great. Well, and I, I want to talk about all of those things for sure. Maybe tell us a little bit about how the practice got started and was built and what was it like building? You said an 11 op multispecialty practice. Not a small, not a small undertaking. No.

Melissa Methven: A small, no. Well, what happened, that’s so much it’s, he had, he’s from Michigan originally, and he was living in Anchorage, but once in a while he’d fill in in Wasilla, and his dad was a dentist. His brother was a dentist. His dad had owned practices and he, he told Scott, you need to open a practice in Wasilla because they were booking out six months plus.

And he said there’s a need there. And originally he was gonna partner with somebody else, but it just kind of fell through. Once he kind of opened it, he was, but he was already building the big building. And what we did though is we actually, uh, built an apartment below. And so we actually lived there. We lived there about, gosh, I think we lived there for three years. Okay. In that same building. Uhhuh to, you know, once you get started it is just a lot of overhead. Yeah. He already so much loans, a hundred thousand dollars of student loans plus now a million plus of opening up this practice. Yep. There’s just a lot of heavy pressures. Mm-hmm. Which I think, um, built up as well.

Kind of his ment, his mental health just kind of spiraled from there. You know, you, you, the heaviness of having the financial burden from student loans, then opening up a practice and he’s, we were the only practice that was open on Saturdays, so he worked six days a week as well. Hmm. So he was definitely grinding and. Over exhausting himself to get started. Mm-hmm. And of course, you know, he’s in his twenties, so we think we’re invincible. Yeah. Oh yeah. We can do this, you know, endless energy.

Ryan Isaac: We’ll do this forever, he’ll be fine one day. Yeah, yeah,

Melissa Methven: Yeah, yeah. We gotta do that now until we, you know, yeah. You know, see much more profit or everything’s steady. I’ve built up a, you know, all the patient base, but really I saw it really affecting his back, affecting his mental health. And when he’d come home, he’d have nothing, you know, nothing left. You’re completely in the exhausted in the tank. Mm-hmm. Nothing in the tank. And. Sunday being your only day off. I mean, you didn’t have any time to kind of fully recharge. And a lot of times a Saturday night was like, oh gosh, okay, I need a drink. And Uhhuh, that’s became the pattern of that kind of heavy drinking. ’cause that was a mm-hmm. Really stressful week.

Ryan Isaac: Yeah. Mm-hmm.

Melissa Methven: And then what happened is, okay, I’m starting to have a lot of back pain. ’cause as you know, the dental, the dentists are kind of hunched over, hunched

Ryan Isaac: All day. All day long. Can I just say, can I just say when I, I, I started in this career about 17 years ago, and I remember, you know, I was in my twenties and I would talk to some of our clients in their forties and early fifties and they would tell me how bad their bodies were beat up. And I would think so dumb and naive back then.

I was like, why? What? You’re in an office all day, you’re a dentist. Why you now I’m blown away at how much damage dentists sustain just physically to their bodies by doing those pattern, like just hunched and the way their arms are all day long. It’s so physically taxing. So you saw this happening? Yeah. They’re neck. Oh, I know. He had so

Melissa Methven: many friends that had neck f Neck surgeries. Yes. Back surgeries. I mean that was a common theme conversation. Mm-hmm. With all our friends that were dentists as well and had been doing it for years. Wow. And so, wow. That came going to his doctor. You know, I’m in a lot of pain and you know, they treat. The symptom. So how they treat the symptom mm-hmm. Is an opiate.

Ryan Isaac: Yeah. Yep. Mm-hmm.

Melissa Methven: And you know, that introduction was of opiates, was manageable, you know, it was an addiction right away. But of course as he didn’t do the work to start caring for himself. Yeah. The root, it just progressed root of things, the root cause and needed more. And actually, I feel it’s not only the physical pain of being hunched over. ’cause even for me, you know, I’d get like a cyst on my wrist and you know, totally. You get carpal tunnel of doing hygiene of re repetitive motions. But there’s more to that. The more that I research is of course it’s the, there’s an energetic exchange. You know, I’m a big believer, you know, we’re made of energy and whatnot. Sure. Well, most patients coming in come in with a lot of fear and anxiety.

Ryan Isaac: Mm-hmm. Yeah. You know, you take that on as a. Yeah. You feel you absorb it? Absolutely.

Melissa Methven: Yeah. You, you sit down and your solar plexus is right there where their head is at, and you are taking on their fears. I mean, my husband was known to be able to take away people’s fear. People would fly in or drive an hour away because he just had a gentle demeanor about it. Mm-hmm. And they, he was able to hold that fear. But unfortunately. That stays in a room, and that will also affect you if you don’t go home and have a practice to clear those energies or refill your cup, you know?

Ryan Isaac: From giving

Melissa Methven: So much from the day.

Ryan Isaac: Can you, you, you were mentioning earlier, uh, you’re a part of a group where people will text you often unfortunate news and updates. Can you talk or just speak to how common this is in terms of the, the, the energy buildup and just the bodies getting beat down and not having a way to clear that or, you know, get their mind and bodies off things? How common and prevalent is this among the, the dentists that you’re, and the teams you’re working with?

Melissa Methven: It’s so prevalent, you know, because then they, they don’t see it until there’s a big burnout. And I’ve had, so after my husband passed, I had many dentists who had never shared with anybody else their close call of dime by suicide. And they shared their stories, you know? And so then I get curious, I started asking more questions and I’ve, some of them have written books now and read them. And a lot of it is also a sensory overload. So now only you’re taking on these energies, but think of the drill, you know? Yeah. Think of the drill, the noise.

The noise. Yeah. The sonic noise. Uhhuh, just the, the sensory overload. So your nerves are just so heightened and tapped out by the end of the day, and they don’t learn the tools to give them back. So one of them that I. That’s why I believe so much in breath work, because this is something they can carry with them at work, at home. So now I’m always telling them, okay, we have to wash our hands in between each patient, so why don’t you take the washing of your hands a minute or two to take a breath work minute?

Ryan Isaac: You know,

Melissa Methven: Just really clearing that energy, the, the anxiety. And also now for the sensory overload as far as the drills. I know they make little earplugs, you know? Custom earplugs that, that dentists could wear even as a hygienist to help. Yeah. With that sensory overload. But it’s, it’s so important for dentists to maybe. Uh, have a routine now. Mm-hmm. A routine. Mm-hmm. Where they start giving back to themselves even before they head home to their families. I know actually, you know, Dr. Nichols had mentioned he doesn’t go straight home. He has to take a little bit of time and for, it’s like a workout or Yeah. Time in nature. Yeah. Uh, for me, I love whole plunging and breath work. Mm-hmm. So finding something that works for you that you can integrate in your day mm-hmm. To kind of give back to your nervous system. You know, breath work is your nervous system’s best friend. Within minutes you can recharge yourself. Yeah. Yep.

Ryan Isaac: Yeah. Uh, we’ll get into that. I’m curious, do you find that these kind of practices, or maybe even just the awareness is becoming more common, are, are, is it more talked about it than it used to be? Or is it still just

Melissa Methven: It’s, it’s, and it isn’t because it’s still called a little bit woo. You know,

Ryan Isaac: There’s

Melissa Methven: Some, you know,

Ryan Isaac: No breathing, I dunno. And

Melissa Methven: They’re like, energy exchange, what is that? I’m like, well, it’s a thing we’re made of energy. And you take that on that constant fear. Mm-hmm. That constant anxiety, so. It is because only I am in a circle now of people that are open to hearing it, but not to the masses. Uh, that’s why I’ve been using my voice. Actually, I signed up to speak at a Texas Dental Association in, in, uh, May, 2026, and it’s gonna be called, uh, chairside Calm, and I’m gonna be teaching nervous system reset for the dentists and dental professions.

Ryan Isaac: Wow. And

Melissa Methven: Bring that awareness of breath work and how you can integrate it to your dental practice.

Ryan Isaac: Mm, yeah. I, I, I. Can see that the, I mean, you know this as good as anybody, the dental industry, dentists, and it’s like a cultural thing. They carry so much and they hold it all in. It’s, they’re very, they, there’s just so much going on. I think they’re so busy. There’s so many things to do, especially when you run and own a practice. It’s probably just easier to, I don’t know, bottle it up and hold it all in. It seems like dentists hold things really close to themselves and, uh, they benefit greatly from networking groups and, you know, support groups where they, where they can do it. I’m also curious, if you don’t mind, like, looking back at those phases, do you notice the patterns you saw in your husband and in his environment with other people? Maybe that’s exactly what you’re talking about. It’s just, it’s a really prevalent, very common thing.

Melissa Methven: Actually, when I’d go to a lot of dental conferences with him, we’d fly to Vegas, we’d fly, you know, all these places. Yeah. And I’d see it, the, the heavy drinking, you know, the totally staying up too late, the numbing. I could tell some, you know, I had drug issues. Yeah. It just, you could tell they were just not healthy. Mm-hmm. Or having healthy habits and it was very overwhelming. It was heavy. And yeah, I have seen more built community where they can chat and not feel so isolated as a dentist. Which I think, you know, back then you kind of were when you get started. ’cause it’s so competitive. Yes. You know that.

Ryan Isaac: And that’s the thing it the, the competition of it, which I think is different in different regions around the country. I don’t know if you found that too. Sometimes they’re very competitive know. It definitely was.

Melissa Methven: Yeah.

Ryan Isaac: Was it like that? Yeah. Yes. Where they like won’t share anything. And then other parts of the country, they’re very open and it’s kind of just a regional cultural thing. Yeah. So you see that all over the place. I see that.

Melissa Methven: We see the financial pressure. So one thing I’m sure for you, being a financial advisor, I don’t think in school they really tell the students that. They’re not gonna get that income that they know they will reach at some point that first or second year. I know my husband had to, we had a lot of, uh, associates that were right outta school. He had to give out loans to them to kinda, you know, be able to pay their rent. And a lot of them had families and had young children. So I think that heavy load right from school and not having a good idea how it will be in the beginning as far as income, that’s really stressful. So that’s something that I saw a lot. What I definitely saw, especially when my husband passed, I could really see the numbers of the dental practice. Even though we had this great big dental practice, there was still it. It seems like a lot of them are stuck. And just staying afloat.

Ryan Isaac: Sure. You know? Mm-hmm.

Melissa Methven: Struggling. Mm-hmm. And they feel stuck. This is what I hear a lot. A lot of dentists feel kind of stuck ’cause this is what they studied for, that this is all they know.

Melissa Methven: But they’re kind of just making ends meet and things are moving fast. The technology’s changing ing after COVID. Yeah. Yeah. Was really totally. Totally different. Totally change, right? Like the now hygiene. That’s why, I mean, you can’t, you

Ryan Isaac: can’t find anybody. Yeah, you can’t. There’s no, you can’t. All of our clients that are just constantly needing hygiene and can’t find people.

Melissa Methven: Yes. Yeah, I know. I’m asked the time, can you come full time? Can you do this? And I’m like, no, sorry. You know, I like the flexibility, but uhhuh it, so that’s stressful. And that’s something that’s, I hear a lot from dentists and, and some of them maybe they don’t like dentistry anymore and but they feel Yeah. Oh, I need to stick with it until I retire. Yeah. But they’re not happy Uhhuh.

Ryan Isaac: Yeah. Do you, uh, do you find that a lot? I, we, we find this all the time in our work, uh, for whatever reason they get into the industry and many, many dentists express the kind of the common desire, like, I need to hurry and earn my way out of dentistry as soon as possible. Yes. Because there’s no way I’m gonna do this for a whole career. I can’t do it. But they, I mean, what do you do when you’re half a million deep in student loans and a million in practice loans and a building and. Common.

Melissa Methven: Yeah. But that you’re not happy if you’re gonna choose. Yeah, I know. It doesn’t matter the money.

Ryan Isaac: Yeah, I know. Yes. And

Melissa Methven: That’s the thing I always say, why did you choose dentistry in the first place? Was it ego driven, right? Mm-hmm. Was it mm-hmm. Oh, the money driven. Like anything that you choose career wise, if it was ego driven, you may never feel fulfilled, right? Mm-hmm. Because now their identity is the, in the title Mm. Is in the big house. Mm-hmm. Is in the car, you’ll, you’ll always feel so empty. Yeah. It’ll never be enough. Mm-hmm. But if you find a purpose in the dental field, if you find something, wow. You know, I’m really, I mean, I truly believe the mouth can is almost like 60% affects, like the system. Oh yeah. The disease, it, everything is a gut health.

You know, oral health is all correlated. Yes. So if you can see how you can impact. Your patient and really educate them on that and how the root cause can a lot of times be found in the mouth. You know, they just would have to find that purpose. But also if they’re not happy and they’re just waiting till the end, it’s time to change. I mean, they’re extremely smart. They, they went to dental school, they can find something else. Yeah. But a lot of times, times they spiral on the eagle mind going, well I can’t, and how, what am I gonna do? And that’s how I say breath work can release getting them back into their heart mm-hmm. And seeing what that might be for them, or seeing clearly what that next step may be.

And a lot of times maybe, maybe it’s more talking, maybe it’s gonna be giving courses, maybe it’s education, who knows? It might still be in the dental profession or it’s gonna be revamping how they do dentistry. Actually, yes. The seven dentists that I, we had our retreat in Sedona. Mm-hmm.

There was only one that was a biological dentist. Now it’s uh, September. The rest of them. Our thinking of shifting the career to become more of a biological dentist. So maybe having a different drive changing. Yes. The way you do things and treat patients could be something that ignites them.

Ryan Isaac: Yeah. I think about this all the time and you know, for better or for worse, there’s so many different types of dentistry out there. There’s a lot of different business models now, and I do think the benefit of that is you can make a shift to something that feels more aligned and and fulfilling. And that could be more chair time, more clinical, and less business management. Or it could be the opposite. You just wanna run, mentor, and be a business leader and not do as much clinical. You can have associates, partners, the type of dentistry you do, the way you do clinical to certain procedures. Like there’s a lot of changes you can make, um, when you start to hit that, that phase. How long did you guys run the practice together in Alaska?

Melissa Methven: Uh, 15 years.

Ryan Isaac: Oh geez. Okay. 15 years. Very, very long time. Yeah.

Melissa Methven: Yeah, 15 years and I was lucky I was able to sell it to another dentist up in Alaska. And actually we just were in Alaska last week and I love, we always visit because they were my dental family. They were, you know, they were such a blessing. And it’s the same staff. It’s same people are really, so, yeah. So it’s really fun that they didn’t change too much, that the heart is still there. Mm-hmm. Yeah. So I, I love that. That hasn’t changed for us.

Ryan Isaac: Yeah. That’s really beautiful. Do you mind talking about, um, the logistics and the financial side of like transitioning a practice, especially under a lot of pressure and duress? Oh, yes. And, you know, circumstances no one would choose in a million years, and we’ve seen that with our clients too. Tragedy or illness or death happens and families have to make really fast, huge financial decisions. Can, do you mind talking about, I love that you’re asking. I’ve never been asked

Melissa Methven: That before. Really?

Ryan Isaac: Yeah. It’s so, it’s so big and sorry. I’ll let, I’ll let you go. It’s just such a huge thing. There’s so many things that happen in life that we don’t ever expect to happen. Any insight you have at all, like things you did or wish you did leading up to that, that could have made it easier or that did make it easier that you want talk about would be really, really. Insightful and helpful.

Melissa Methven: I think it will be. I, yeah. When my house has been passed, I wasn’t under anything. My name wasn’t under anything.

Ryan Isaac: Oh, okay. Okay.

Melissa Methven: And he did not have a will.

Ryan Isaac: Okay. So

Melissa Methven: For me, the office was, obviously, everything was a shock.

Ryan Isaac: Mm-hmm. And we were actually

Melissa Methven: In Maui when, when my husband passed Hawaii. Wow.

Ryan Isaac: Wow. And

Melissa Methven: So I remember calling the office manager to let her know, and the staff, and, you know, we had associates there and everything was still running while we were away. I had to find a probate lawyer instantly. Yeah. That could put me as a personal representative. Mm-hmm. Asap the quickest that he could because payroll was just a in a week.

Yeah. And yeah, the staff was panicking. Like who, you know, well of course they were, but they were just wondering like, what’s gonna happen? How are we gonna get paid now? And, and so, yeah. I was lucky enough to find a lawyer that within a couple days, uh, have found a judge that could put me as a personal representative, and I was able to learn to do payroll and have everything running good. But also my husband was, uh, under a litigation, which I think a lot of actually dentists deal with.

Ryan Isaac: Very common. Very, very common. Yep.

Melissa Methven: Yeah, it was a seven year battle and her office was under bankruptcy. I mean, I, it was, it was very, very complicated. My husband had put it under bankruptcy, so I, once I was, became a personal representative, I had told the judge. ’cause we were under um mm-hmm. Bankruptcy that I wanted to have. It was only gonna be me to see the bank accounts to do payroll. I will do it all. ’cause I want to see all the numbers and not anybody to take advantage of the situation. Yeah. Uhhuh, you know, and um, so I did that and then. We kept the office running.

I actually was very, very lucky. Like I said, we, I had known the staff. We didn’t have a big turnover for 15 years. We kept the office running. We had a, uh, we had an associate also. I had a lot of dental friends. They actually came in and experience. Yes. They had, they came in. So from Anchorage, which is about an hour away, we had a lot of dentist friends who came in and subbed in for Scott’s schedule.

Wow. Okay. Because Scott had a three columns. I mean, he was Oh, so good at doing it. He, he was the most generator at the office. Wow. So I had dentist come in until I could hire another replacement. Mm-hmm. And then I found a replacement for myself as well. And I had another friend who’s a dental hygienist. She took my schedule and I came in as the role as the owner and the manager. And I, I, yeah. I, I. I was so lucky. I mean, I think there was angels and miracles all along the way. You know, our sales rep, he says, I found somebody for you. I have an associate, a dentist that’s looking for work. Do you wanna interview him? I’m like, okay, sure. I’ve never done this before, but, sure. And I was lucky that I found a, uh, another dentist. That we hired another hygienist. And most importantly, I wanted to do that. We had to keep the office running. ’cause if I, yeah. Uhhuh was gonna sell it. Mm-hmm. We didn’t want it to, uh, I wanted to sell it, showing that it’s a profitable business. Yep.

Ryan Isaac: You know? Mm-hmm. Yeah. So it declines quickly. They decline quickly when the main provider isn’t there, doing the job every single day. Very quickly. Yeah, very quickly.

Melissa Methven: And, and it did a little bit, but for the most part, our staff did such a fantastic job to keep everything running. Uh, and as hard as that was for our staff, it, they were very emotional. Everyone was in shock.

Ryan Isaac: Oh, yeah. Yeah. But they Oh, yeah.

Melissa Methven: Knew the heart. Scott poured into this practice. I mean, he was so generous. He was so to his staff and patients, that is one thing. I think because he was such a kind and generous boss, people just showed up. Mm-hmm. You know, patients still wanted to come there. Our staff wanted to do everything possible for, for me and the kids and the families so that we could legally, I could have ran the dental practice for at least two years. Okay. And I, it was also overwhelming that for me, the thought of doing that I, I was like, no, I just just wanna find somebody to sell it.

And so I did, however, it took a while because to find someone that can afford that for the price that I wanted, didn’t wanna just give it away. Mm-hmm. So actually what uh, happened is that I sold the business, I kept the building. Mm-hmm. Leased the building to the dentist who bought it. I had the land. So that was kinda really nice for me ’cause it generated an income at a time that I really needed it and could spend a bit more time on healing me and the family.

Ryan Isaac: Yeah, totally. So

Melissa Methven: I had a lot, a lot of hard decisions. I was going to court for the litigation, I was going court for the bankruptcy I was seeing. I don’t know how many lawyers I was. Oh my gosh. Communicating with a lot of lawyers. So one thing I had to say, because I had to make a lot of clear decision in a time that I definitely probably had brain fog, I was in shock. Mm-hmm. I did not drink, I wasn’t a big drinker, but I knew not to touch alcohol for the whole time period. Mm-hmm. Because I really had to make clear decisions. And I found some mentors. Uh, I found some dentists that were friends and a new Scott, and I knew their intentions would be for me and my family. They had no other ties financially other than. I can trust them with asking questions. Okay. What do you think I should sell the practice for? Oh, yeah. How do I should go about it? I should, I hired a, um, a sales representative that is more dental related. He was actually from out of state and he was the best man. I wish his name was Caleb. I forget his name now. I feel so bad. But he was

Ryan Isaac: Like a broker. Like a broker. He was a broker. Broker, yeah. He was fantastic.

Melissa Methven: Now I’m like, oh, I wish I remembered his name. That’s okay.

Ryan Isaac: Yeah,

Melissa Methven: Because he was fantastic. I think he was an angel. He worked with me in the chaos of it all, you know, and really somebody I can trust and he helped me communicate back and forth with the prospect, with the buyer. I did have a big dental group company from Texas inquire. Oh yeah. You know, I had this like a DS O kind of thing. Yes.

Ryan Isaac: Yeah. Uhhuh.

Melissa Methven: Yes. But how I felt with the Ds OI, I don’t believe this in all DSOs, but. Particularly, I didn’t wanna lose the heart of the practice.

Ryan Isaac: Yeah. Mm-hmm. Totally understand. And

Melissa Methven: I didn’t want it to, the quality to, to drop, you know? Yeah. Or that’s kind of what we pride ourselves on was the quality mm-hmm. Of our crowns, everything, you know, and mm-hmm. And the treatments. So I didn’t wanna lose the heart and the quality. Mm-hmm. I think for our staff, it really scared them if I sold to a DSL and I was lucky that I found another dentist that was referred from our sales rep. Hmm. And the minute, actually, I gave him a tour to him and his wife, I knew, I knew that was him. He would cool. Would buy it. And I’m so happy he did. And yeah.

Uh, he’s done a really good job to just keep that heart and the quality and it, it’s flourishing for him. But that’s kind of what I did and I only. Sold everything probably a, a year ago and Wow. Wow. Okay. Yeah.

Ryan Isaac: Yeah. Start to finish. You’re talking about what, two, a two year process of a year? All the attorneys sales and

Melissa Methven: Yes.

Ryan Isaac: Longer than you thought. It would’ve been longer. The probate

Melissa Methven: Took about a year to close.

Ryan Isaac: Oh geez. Okay. Yeah.

Melissa Methven: And so what that happens is that you open up a, an account, just an estate account. Mm-hmm. So all the money, I am personally as a wife, not allowed to use that for personal use, only for paying the bills.

Ryan Isaac: Mm-hmm. Paying

Melissa Methven: For whatever Scott’s estate. Mm-hmm. So you have to be very careful with that ’cause they’re watching everything.

Ryan Isaac: Mm-hmm. Uh,

Melissa Methven: You know, tax wise and yeah. Uh, and so yeah, it was a lot of back forth, a lot of lawyers, and after a year, the probate was closed and that was a big relief. That was a big relief after the probate was closed. Of course, life insurance is another thing and maybe an important notion. Uh, a lot of people were worried that I wouldn’t get life insurance because with suicide, oftentimes you don’t uhhuh Yeah. But the clause for our life insurance was you’ve had to have life insurance for at least three years, a few years, something like that. So I was able to have that, but that took, uh, so it was March, so not till June. So you have to think about the family. We don’t get to see any of that income and uh, my personal bank account was at zero. So I do educate a lot of wives that kind of stay stand back to the finances and don’t really look at anything. Mm-hmm. Don’t do that. Don’t put yourself in that situation.

Ryan Isaac: Mm-hmm. You know,

Melissa Methven: Ask question, get knowledgeable. I mean, I took a crash course on finance, you know? Mm-hmm. And I have a fantastic financial advisor now as well. Awesome. So Good. And to really help me. Make big decisions, but also learn. Learn the whole process. Yeah.

Ryan Isaac: To see everything. Yeah. Mm-hmm. In the, in the things, and correct me if I’m wrong, the things you’ve mentioned here would be themes of basic organization, family and business, finances to have everyone involved. I don’t know, how did it feel like your financial lives and all the stuff was scattered everywhere? Or did you have Oh gosh. A central place. Okay. Yeah. Oh, that’s how most people are. I mean, it’s very common. Yeah. It

Melissa Methven: Was such a mess and not it, honestly, I had, my girlfriends had bought this big whiteboard. Mm-hmm. My husband had so many credit cards, so many things. I literally, with my doc, legal documents, went to every bank in, was Alaska asking if my husband had a bank account. Okay. I had to piece a puzzle. And of course, once the probate is open, they, uh, creditors have a year to come ask if you owe them anything, any debt. And there was a lot, a lot of debt that just kept rolling in, you know, from anything that, uh, if we had leased dental equipment to, you know, mm-hmm. All these. Even patient, I’m still sending sometimes, uh, checks for patients and things like that. Wow. It’s just, it’s, it’s overwhelming. So having a team that could really help you navigate all that, and they really did. The office manager did a great job to help me. Awesome. And having mentors as well that you can talk to. And a financial, financial advisor actually mm-hmm. Was pivotal for me as well, to keep me on track and what to do next. Wow. And how to, right now, since I learned a big lesson, not having a will, not having everything in place, say estate

Ryan Isaac: Planning and will and trust, and I, that was the number one I, because you could avoid probate. It would’ve avoided probate if there was a loan. You know how much that cost

Melissa Methven: Me? No. That cost me $20,000.

Ryan Isaac: Yeah. Uhhuh

Melissa Methven: $20,000 to put me as a wife just to get you

Ryan Isaac: In charge of everything. Yes. Just so you could be Yeah. Which was your rightful responsibility and position anyway. Yeah. Yeah. Crazy. ’cause we

Melissa Methven: Needed, yeah, we, so that could save you money and time that you can save and time. Absolutely. Yeah. So that’s why now I, for me, I have everything in place. You know, my financial advisor really worked with me to have financial family planning and mm-hmm. I know where everything, and everybody knows who’s the one who’s be helping and, and communicating with. Mm-hmm. But to have that in place would be really helpful for your loved ones. And as a wife or husband, just. Sit down together with your financial planner and both of you be so clear Underst, understand what’s going on. Understand, yes. Yeah, Uhhuh. Yeah, because my husband, I had even learnt going back months prior because he was just willing to lose everything to win the litigation.

Melissa Methven: Really did. He kept, he would’ve put us under, I mean, he had taken out loans and loans and loans and ultimately the lawyers won both lawyers on both side. You know how much they made? Over a million dollars.

Ryan Isaac: Oh my gosh. Wow. And that was even leading up to all the stuff that you had to deal with?

Melissa Methven: Yes. I, two months after, you know, my husband passed, I had all the litigation lawyers, actually, I was pretty upset because they were texting me the day of the day after going, who’s gonna pay me? Who’s, what’s happened now? We had lost the case and I was like, leave me alone. Like, I don’t care.

Ryan Isaac: I don’t, I literally don’t care. Yeah. Don’t ever.

Melissa Methven: Settled as quickly as I could. I said, I am done with this. I will figure things out. Of course, I said they’ll get the money once I sell the practice or, or make some changes sold. I actually within months to pay lower fees. ’cause they were up to a hundred thousand dollars actually. Oh my God. Yeah. We, we owned a, uh, condo in Girdwood, Alaska. I sold that with it. Months. I just started selling things in our home and actually I even, uh, sold our home. A lot of people, you know, counselors were saying, don’t change so much, but it just. Needed to all happen. You needed to

Ryan Isaac: Clean up. Yeah. You needed to like clean it up, take care of it all.

Melissa Methven: We really did. Yeah. Wow.

Ryan Isaac: So, yeah. And you’re touching on something we, we say all the time, which is probably one of the most boring things about financial planning. But really being organized is the key. It’s the foundation of everything. You can’t make decisions, you can’t deal with things that happen, opportunities or tragedies unless you have like a central place of organization to understand where everything is and what it’s doing and what it’s there for. So that estate planning, wills, trusts, business planning, insurance planning. There’s a lot of themes here that, wow, that took you a lot of time and money to have to clean up after that. That’s, that’s a lot. It was a lot. Must’ve been very taxing. It

Melissa Methven: Was so stressful. I keep going back like, how did I imagine survive that? And all I can say I survived it because, you know, I believe in God or higher power, whatever everyone wants to call it. But there’s no other way I could have done it without my faith and just prayers from others. I, that’s truly what happened. And just keep. Following my intuition through it all as well. Mm-hmm. I had to really make some big decisions and I kept on, okay, this feels right. Even me moving to Arizona, I knew nobody here. Mm-hmm. I knew. Oh really? Absolutely. Okay. Not a soul here.

Ryan Isaac: How did you choose Arizona? What? I had come here

Melissa Methven: From the sunshine

Ryan Isaac: After Alaska.

Melissa Methven: Yeah. I needed all the sunshine. And actually that’s another topic for Alaska. Just the, uh, the darkness and how it really messes with your circadian rhythm. Yes. And how that affects your mental health. So that’s a whole other topic. But I had come to Arizona years before. A local anesthesia course. Mm-hmm. And I remember loving it here. Mm-hmm. I was like, wow, this place is, everyone seems so happy here. And yeah. Uh, Uhhuh and, and active, I’ve always been really active. I’m like, wow, everyone’s fit here and, uh, you know, seem happy and the sunshine. And I just remember going home and telling my husband, we need to move to Arizona. And Wow. Started looking at schools, started looking at everything and he thought I was going crazy ’cause he’s like, I am not moving to the desert.

The middle way. The middle of the desert. Yeah. Uhhuh because that’s what everybody thinks about Arizona. Yeah. But I was like, actually no. Now that I’ve moved here, I’m like, it’s, it’s amazing. It’s, yeah. And there’s variety, but. I took a leap of faith of what I remember that feeling was, and I sold absolutely everything and moved me, my two kids, a dog, six suitcases, four months, and it was five months after my husband passed.

Ryan Isaac: Whoa. Wow. Wow.

Melissa Methven: Yeah. It, but it’s now, at the time I was definitely scared and when I arrived, I’m not saying going, oh yeah, I knew this was the right choice. No, I go, I was like, what did I do? I left. You’re still reeling

Ryan Isaac: From everything. You’re still Yeah. A couple years into wrapping everything up anyway. Wow. That is, that’s such a huge, a lot.

Melissa Methven: It was a lot. But now I know that that was the, ultimately the right choice me Was

Ryan Isaac: The right, the right call for you. So let, let’s just pause here for a sec. I want to go to where, where you went next. Writing, teaching, speaking, mentoring, being a support for people, everything that you’re doing now, before we go there, is there anything you would pause and reflect on from just that part of the story? If anyone’s sitting in that right now, dentists, teams, spouses, friends, family, um, of a, of a dentist that might be noticing these things from somebody. This is the, the month and the day to be, um, you know, to raise awareness for this stuff. So, just pausing there is, is there anything you would say to people who are in that environment or going through the, those same situations?

Melissa Methven: Yes. Actually, this is a very good question. If I could be honest. There were signs before. Okay. One of the signs that we started noticing is my husband taking more sick days. Okay. Or sometimes midday he’d leave. Okay. I remember being at work and here I am working away. And then the, the front office says, where did Scott go? Is he coming back? Mm-hmm. There’s a patient in the chair. And I was like, I don’t know. He’d even tell me. Mm-hmm. You know, and so there was a, those times and a lot of it, he would tell them, well, I’m dealing with lawyers, I’m dealing with the litigation. Okay, sure. The staff knew this was going on.

Ryan Isaac: Mm-hmm.

Melissa Methven: So we just kind of said, well, that’s what he’s dealing with. But these were the signs, more missing days. And also you could just tell in his demeanor with patient is almost you lose that fire that ignites you at work. You know, he was a perfectionist and he loved dentistry, but I think he was getting very exhausted. He was getting just exhausted and it was just almost just following protocol at this point.

Ryan Isaac: Mm-hmm. You know,

Melissa Methven: And so those were kind of signs where if, you know, start noticing a shift in their behavior, then maybe s. Taking them aside and talking to them. Even if you’re not the wife or you feel you’re not that close, or you feel you’re intruding in their personal space, you might be the one where they’re actually gonna remove that veil. Be like, wow, thank you for seeing me. Because they do so well in hiding because they don’t want to be a burden to anybody else. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Uh, they don’t want, they, they are the boss. They have to be withheld, almost that superman feeling. I, I can’t seem like I need help because the whole office will fall apart.

Mm-hmm. So I think being seen and saying, it’s okay, we’re here for you. How can we help? Or, Hey, I feel maybe you need, maybe you need a week off. Maybe you need this. Yeah. Take and don’t worry. We’ll, we’ll take, we’ll take care of it. Mm-hmm. Or I know a lot of them. That’s why having an associate’s so key. Mm. But if you don’t be okay in taking that time off for your mental health. Taking those mental breaks will save your life. Because here’s what happens with mental health too. You, you, you get so in that brain fog and you captive, you can’t see out of that cloud. Yeah. And so having someone bring clarity or seeing you or starting to notice, then they can maybe start removing that veil and seeing themselves. ’cause my husband never once said he was depressed, never once said he needed help. So removing that veil for him seeing his truth was his like whole identity. He was just a mm-hmm. Maybe the shame, the guilt talk, bring it up. The more people, the better. Or even intervention style. I kind of wish I would’ve done an intervention style type of meeting for him.

I had spoken to family members, of course, close friends. I think that would’ve, that would be really good for people if you start noticing, don’t wait. Don’t wait. Well, it seems okay. No, ’cause we hide it so well, they’re gonna hide it extremely well from even their, their spouse.

Ryan Isaac: Yeah. Yeah. Okay. I’ve had

Melissa Methven: So many, so many. People that almost died by suicide and said, I never even told my husband, my wife Yeah. That I had suicidal thoughts. Yeah. So even asking those questions mm-hmm. Do you ha I had asked that, you know, and, and it was always a no.

Ryan Isaac: Yeah, yeah. Mm-hmm.

Melissa Methven: But, but tr. Maybe from a stranger, honestly, someone that is the stranger and from the outside can make even bigger impact, I feel.

Ryan Isaac: Okay. Wow. Thank you for sharing that. And maybe that that message is kind of the segue to the, the book behind You, the Truth Behind the Smile. Is that what it’s called? Behind the Smiles? Yes. The Truth

Melissa Methven: Behind The Smiles. Okay, because, so how did you,

Ryan Isaac: Yeah. Go into that, please. How did that come about? Like, what was, what was the first thing you did to get into the space you’re in now? How did that evolve? What, what did you do first?

Melissa Methven: Well, because I was now taking care of the dental practice, a lot of times I had to communicate with all our patients and we had a, our social media platform, mostly Facebook. And I would write on that. Write and write and just to address everybody. I had some, many people say, wow, you should, you should write a book someday. But I remember thinking to myself, I am just in my beginning stages for my own healing and my children maybe 10 years down the road, but I ended up meeting, uh, a publisher. There’s no, no coincidence. Her name is Kira Brenton, and she says, no, I see you and you’re gonna be writing a book. She also, and the only way I knew I could write a book, she offered these five day writing adventures. She’s a writing coach. So I, I said, this is the only way I’m gonna have the time if I’m taken away. I was on top of a tree house in Mill Valley, California in the Muir Woods in, I wrote 48,000 words in five days.

Ryan Isaac: Oh my gosh. Okay.

Melissa Methven: Yeah. And it, but she helps you, uh, regulate your nervous system so you don’t you. Uh, you don’t kind of burn out. Mm-hmm. And also I was, once I signed the contract to write my book, I started praying a lot and actually started getting a lot of visions. And I’d wake up in the middle of the night in three o’clock in the morning and the cover of my pick of my book is actually. My family picture.

I can see it here. Yes. It’s a family picture. And that one is actually the one we use for dental practice, for advertising. Okay? We would send postcards and we’re all smiling and looking super happy. Got a boy and a girl for kids. Just picture perfect, right?

Ryan Isaac: Mm-hmm. And so I

Melissa Methven: Had that vision and I said, that’s it. We, we just hid so much behind that smile. I remember taking those pictures and where Scott was at, he was just so checked out for those pictures. Mm-hmm. I was feeling so lonely. Mm-hmm. Because I didn’t know what else to do. Mm-hmm. You know, there’s, so, once you’re trying to help somebody, but it’s just not received and they’re not listening, it’s not taking that person, it’s not working. It’s not working. You’re like, I don’t know what else to do. Mm-hmm. And how to reach that person. But I knew I had to write this book because also my husband, on both sides of his family, both grandparents had died by suicide. Wow. And that was kept silent for so many years. And I said, I can’t stay silent anymore. Even when he died, a lot of people said, oh, what are you gonna say? What are gonna say, because there comes a lot of shame to saying Die by suicide. I said, yeah, oh no, we’re gonna say die by suicide, and I’m gonna put the hotline. Mm-hmm. You know, on the obituary, I’m gonna talk about it. I just felt really called to talk about our story, everything about it.

So that’s why I wrote my book and it was our whole truth. And it was so scary because I thought, what is everybody gonna think? What are Scott’s friends gonna think? Yeah. His family, because mm-hmm. There, there, there was a dark side, I mean, yeah. Mm-hmm. With my husband’s addictions and the mental abuse that came because the more he was in. Addiction. Yeah. The more he wanted to control me. Totally. Because he’s scared to lose me, right? Mm-hmm. So the financial, where he just stripped everything financially.

Ryan Isaac: Mm-hmm.

Melissa Methven: That was a way to keep me small. Keep me there.

Ryan Isaac: Yeah.

Melissa Methven: So I do talk about that, and I know that was really, really hard for some of his friends to see that side of Scott, you know? Yeah. Because I know that wasn’t his heart. That wasn’t him anymore.

Ryan Isaac: No. Yeah. Yeah. No, you

Melissa Methven: Know, that wasn’t him anymore. I, I, I know this was the, the darkness, you know, that made him kind of just change. I, I know the last year I couldn’t even recognize who I married anymore. It wasn’t Scott. And so that’s the truth behind the smile is our story. And I know it’s a hard one to read, you know, from the first few chapters. There’s light to it. Yeah. There are tools that I’ve incorporated. My kids, my kids were only six and eight years old at the time, and they were there, they are still dealing with some of the, you know, the traumas. Luckily, luckily, luckily, you know, God, I listened to his instincts and, and on that day they never saw dad the way I did.

Mm-hmm. And that, I think, saved so much more trauma. Mm-hmm. But I talk about tools and being mindful in your environment. I have a whole chapter about dentistry and why I feel it’s n number one and suicide right now. So it’s just bringing awareness and being light to it and inspiring people to start removing that veil. You’re not gonna be a burden. Ask the hard questions to your friends. Mm. Go deep. I think oftentimes we feel, oh, we don’t wanna go get into their business, or we don’t want Yeah,

Ryan Isaac: You don’t wanna, it’s, yeah. And impose improve, you know, or embarrass them or,

Melissa Methven: yes.

Ryan Isaac: Yeah, like expose a weakness or something, but it’s not at all like that.

Melissa Methven: Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. As long as you, you know, you do it with love and compassion. I always say, I wish I would’ve had a friend who would’ve said, Hey Melissa, I see you’re struggling. I see Scott struggling. How can we help?

Ryan Isaac: Yeah. Mm-hmm.

Melissa Methven: And I didn’t.

Ryan Isaac: Yeah. You

Melissa Methven: Know, I didn’t, ’cause I think a lot of people didn’t wanna see that about Scott either. You know? Yeah.

Ryan Isaac: We don’t, yeah, we don’t want to. We don’t, yeah. Like you said, it’s the, the, the mask or the veil that we wear. And it’s uncomfortable for the people on the other side of it too, because you can always feel like that. You can tell when there’s, and you know, it’s not congruent. Something’s not lining up and the outside isn’t matching the inside, but it’s, it is a hard thing to bring up. It’s really, it’s tough. It

Melissa Methven:  And I also found, I learned later on with therapy and whatnot, when I was trying to bring this up with somebody else, a friend, a lot of time when I’d get a pushback it’s because they would now shine a truth on their life. Yeah. Mm-hmm. So that was probably why sometimes I get a bit of a pushback or they’re not ready for that information is because now yeah, they’d have to see their lives.

Mm-hmm. And shine a truth on them. So, I mean, it would talk about therapy. That was one thing I talk about a lot. I definitely saw a psychologist and she would blended. You know, her psychology and faith-based as well, because I know God was there all along for me. And having that blend was really important. Breath work, oh my goodness, I, that vision, that PTSD that I had of finding my husband, ’cause I, I did CPR, I found him and I thought I had saved him. Just all that PTSD of going to the trauma unit for three days at the hospital, sitting there by his bedside. It haunted me for a really long time.

Ryan Isaac: Oh my god.

Melissa Methven: And breath work is the only tool that got rid of that PTSD for me. I still remember, I am in a breath work session an hour long and that vision, that vision came right to my face and it was almost like it’s time to let it go now. Let it go. And I, it never bothered me. Afterward, it was like a process of, you feel it, you see it, but it’s time to let it go of these past traumas. And oftentimes that’s what I talk about in my book, is suppression. I suppress so much my emotions. My husband’s suppress. He used numbing agents for me. My suppression turned into chronic illness, autoimmune, it started affecting my, my body. I, I ended up having. MRIs and, and breast cancer scares. And then I had a cyst on my vocal cord where I started sounding like a smoker. Wow. I had to have a surgery on my vocal cord and I couldn’t speak after that for four weeks. And I had young children at the time. I knew then God was telling me to use my voice. So

Ryan Isaac: mm-hmm. I’m here saying

Melissa Methven: All that suppression, if you are not gonna shine and see your truth, it’s gonna show up in chronic illness, or you’re gonna try and numb it.

And it’s just, it, it’s, it’s so important. So that’s kind of what I, I bring awareness. Okay. And I became a breathwork facilitator. ’cause I said, I have to learn this gift. I have to learn this gift and give it back to. Anybody that I come across, you know, who’s willing to and open to it. So right now you talk about shifting professions, you know, yes, I studied dental hygiene, but what ignites me now is breath work using my voice with my own, you know, podcast as well. I was speaking at dental conferences, but seeing that shift with breath work. Mm-hmm. And how I can blend that now with the dental community and bring that a lot of it too, because I’m a big advocate for airway and mm-hmm. Uh, with, we did a lot of airway in our dental practice. ’cause I had learned that from my son having airway issues and not the right quality of oxygen.

So I know with breath, you, you can, your brain functions. Can be a lot clearer. Mm-hmm. You can heal your body on a cellular level. So this is how important, having quality oxygen flow and in and in also having a breath work routine.

Ryan Isaac: Mm. Okay. I was gonna ask you about that. So is that, you were just doing this in an, in an office there locally. Is that something you do, um, or will be doing more often? Yes. Or trainings or coaching or, or Yes. How, you know, what, what is that like

Melissa Methven: Right now? I was started off just more one-on-one. I just love one-on-one. ’cause a lot of people Totally, it’s their first time doing breath work and going into a big group could be really intimidating because it is a safe place to express emotions and a lot of times with breath work you might cry.

Ryan Isaac: Out of nowhere. Yeah. Outta nowhere. You just start crying out of nowhere. You’re like, oh, something’s working. Yeah. Uhhuh, yes. Or people’s

Melissa Methven: Scream outta anger. It’s a safe place. Wow. To scream, to let out anger. Mm-hmm. Or pure joy. So sometimes people are like, well, I’ve heard this is what can happen. So doing one-on-one has been really fantastic, but now I feel, wow, I can, I could get to more people doing groups. So I’ve loved being able to, uh, be at a dental retreat and Okay. Provide breath work as a group, going to dental practices and what I love, usually I’d be at a studio but actually doing it at the dental practice. So we, one of them, we, we just kind of. Move things around in the front office. I had all the masks I saw, I think, and, but then you help shift the whole energy of the dental practice. It unites your staff. It in alignment, it sheds those layers. And to see their boss just be completely open as well in wanting to help their staff, it’s gonna be more than just generating money. Mm-hmm. Let’s help each other out. Let’s be there for each other and let’s, it just opens up a platform to be open about what’s going on and let’s be there for build community. So that’s kind of where I’m going. And actually, in a week, gosh, a week and a half, I’ve been on a, a documentary series called Writer’s Island. Oh, okay. Yeah. I think I’ve, I’ve seen

Ryan Isaac: Some of that actually.

Melissa Methven: Yeah. I was there in June, in, in Bridge Virgin Islands, and I wrote my second book actually on this island called The Gut God Connection. And that could be a whole other story because that is how I saw also our environment played a big role in our mental health. So, talk about tox toxins, right? Mm-hmm. Um, dentists deal with mercury, so mm-hmm. Amalgam. Mm-hmm. Removing amalgam. Toxins in their bodies. Your environment affects your gut health. Same as your fear, anxiety. Mm. So how it’s, there’s that gut brain connection. So that’s my second book that I Amazing. I wrote.

Ryan Isaac: Okay. Yeah. It’s interesting you say that. We have a dear friend and client, and she’s done speaking for us and very influential dentist, Dr. Michelle Jorgensen out of, uh, Utah. Oh, Utah. Oh my gosh.

Melissa Methven: That’s who I’m having on my podcast tomorrow. Oh, really?

Ryan Isaac: Tell her hello. He’s been, Michelle was probably our 10th client ever. And, uh, huge story around mercury poisoning. Yes. And yeah, huge. That’s so, that’s interesting. That’s, I’m

Melissa Methven: So excited. I’ve been pre, I’ve been so prepping it. She’s, I’ve been trying get on for a month’s. Phenomenal. And tomorrow she’ll be on, because really, I, I have inclination, you know, of course I can’t go back and find all the, uh, have all the evidence, but my husband was known in Wasilla to remove. All the amalgams. Yeah. He was a cosmetic dentist. Mm-hmm. And he, I know he didn’t do all the protocols Yeah. That she talks about mm-hmm. To do it safely. Mm-hmm. And I know we also had mold in our house in Alaska, so I feel his depression, uh, you know, it was a mm-hmm. Accumulation of everything, but I think the root, the toxicity that he had.

Ryan Isaac: Sure. Oh yeah.

Melissa Methven: It’s a neurotoxin.

Ryan Isaac: Yes. Uhhuh.

Melissa Methven: Yeah. So that’s kind of where that’s, and I saw it with my son too. My son, uh, his behavior changes and everything. I went to Dr. Amen’s clinics for brain scans. I’ve done gut tests. Mm-hmm. Mi toin heavy metals for my whole entire family. So my book is kind of opening up that door through again, our family story to like, wow, this was probably the root cause environment. Environment. Mm-hmm. Yeah. How important that is.

Ryan Isaac: Well, so cool that you have Michelle coming on your Yes. Your podcast. And, uh, she’s, she’s the best. She’s been, she’s awesome. She’s just done so many huge things, uh, on top of her huge dental career too, so that, I’m excited for you guys. That’s really cool. Cool.

Yeah.

Melissa Methven: Thank you. I’m really excited. That’s, that’s awesome. And so now they’re gonna be filming season two in a couple weeks. Okay. Uh, for Writer’s Island and they’ve Oh, cool. Such an honor. They’ve asked me to come as the breath work facilitator. Really cool. And not the author this time for, so I’m gonna be doing. Breath work sessions for the authors on the island this time.

Ryan Isaac: Okay. Okay. Well, I was gonna ask you, I could probably, we could probably, we could talk for another hour or two, easily. There’s so many, probably so many connections in the industry and things I’d love to ask. But for now, I mean, I think we’re gonna do, uh, a webinar. Did we work that out yet? I, I have a meeting

Melissa Methven: I think with you tomorrow. You were like, tomorrow.

Ryan Isaac: Okay. I knew that’s on the, yeah, I knew that’s on the calendar. So, in the meantime, um, what, what services do you, whatever you’d like to talk about that do you provide, that you would like to have? If you’d like anyone to reach out, how would they find you? Um, you know, or maybe just grab a copy of the book, anything like that at all that you, you want to talk about here, where people could, um, get in touch or even, I don’t know, if you’re a part of groups or, you know, support groups or anything that you wanna mention and all would be great.

Melissa Methven: Yes, thank you. Well, I have a website called Melissa Gratitude. Life. Okay. And I also have my podcast not alone with Melissa Sue on all the platforms. Okay. But it’s, I, on my website you’ll see that I could be hired for speaking engagements, but also breath work. I do virtual in person groups, uh, retreats, uh, dental practices, you know, or, or any medical field in that respect.

So, and I will be starting actually at coaching. Uh, business as well. So I actually will have a wait list for that because I have so many people ask me, which test did we do for my, me and my kids, the detox journeys. Uh, even though I am not a naturopath, I’m not a functional mm-hmm. Practitioner. You’ll work alongside to a functional, but you’ll see what I’ve done. ’cause I have seen so many specialists along the way, so I’m trying to save you, you know that

Ryan Isaac: Yeah. All

Melissa Methven: Of that. All the financial, yeah. You know, I, I paid so much money to just get to that clarity, that clear, clear view. Wow. So I will be doing some coaching for detoxing and also having, getting outta that fog.

’cause a lot of times mm-hmm. I feel mm-hmm. That first step, everyone’s kind of in fear and they kind of spiral and won’t take it. So I do find decluttering, starting with the gut is so important for that brain clarity. Mm-hmm. So that’s kind of where, and I’ve always been into a naturopath. I may go to school to become a naturopath at some point. Okay. You never know. Yeah.

Ryan Isaac: See where, see where it takes you. Yeah. Yes. Yeah. I, I love that. You know, it’s such a parallel to the, well, it’s just different, you know, the, the financial work, everything begins with decluttering, organizing, taking a step back to see what’s going on, not changing it, not judging it yet.

Just like what’s happening, what, what’s even going on before you can know what to add or to take away or change or keep. And I love that. That’s, that’s really cool. Congratulations on everything. Ah, thank you. That’s, that’s really exciting. You’re clearly and will continue to impact so many people in such profound ways and probably reach people in, in spaces where they are. Absolutely. Where they feel absolutely alone. And then just look. Totally shiny and fine on the outside, and I’m sure that’s a lot of people it we know statistically in this industry. So thanks for all the work that you do. Yes. Coming here to share it all. I appreciate it.

Melissa Methven: Uh, thank you very much, Ryan. Yeah. It’s such an honor and, uh, yeah, I have no doubt this will at least touch one person for, if not more. I have no doubt for sure. I, and I can always reach out to me. You know, I, uh, they can DM me. I do get a lot of dms on social media Okay. At Melissa Gratitude, and I’m always pretty good at getting back to them, right? Because for me, if I can help inspire one person, this is all worth. Using my voice. Love it.

Ryan Isaac: Yeah. I would love to see, um, yeah, you, uh, you know, do do more in the space and, and touch more lives and, you know, get involved in in those ways that you have already and just more offices and more lives. So much.

Thank you so much, much appreciate it. Much. Thanks for everyone for tuning in much. Yeah. Uh, enjoy your, your interview tomorrow with, uh, with Michelle. That’s gonna be so good. Oh yeah. I’m so excited. So, great. Alright, well thanks everyone for tuning in. We’ll catch you next time. Bye-Bye.

Keywords: mental health, dental industry, breath work, addiction, financial advice, dental practice, grief, self-care, purpose, transition, emotional well-being, support systems, dental community, healing journeys

Behavioral Finance, Getting Organized, Work Life Balance